Referred to as ‘The Reformer’, this Enneagram type is often afraid of being perceived as being wrong or flawed. These types may say ‘No’ directly when given the opportunity to be ‘right’ or explain why their answer is the best and most correct one. They may feel it is their obligation to fact check and provide reasoning behind why they are in the right.

Dubbed ‘The Helper’, this Enneagram type tends to struggle with a deeply rooted fear of disappointing or negatively affecting others. With hesitance to saying no or maintaining clear boundaries - Enneagram Two is often left overbooked, and apologizing for it despite being the one overwhelmed. For these types, a less confrontational approach tends to feel the least abrasive or intimidating - and they result to using tactics such as ghosting and/or refusing to give a direct answer and relying on the proposer to use context clues.

The Achiever of the Enneagram types may be afraid of coming off as inadequate, or disappointing others. Similarly in that sense to the Enneagram Two, saying no can prove to be a challenge. However, the reasoning varies - Enneagram Three tends to avoid situations they do not excel at and may find excuses not to show their weaknesses to others. Instead of plainly declining, they may use the proposal as an opportunity to mention a larger, more brag-worthy project that has been occupying their time.

The Individualist factor of type fours causes an unsettling feeling towards being unremarkable, or feelings of insignificance. This type tends to be passive aggressive in nature, and even moody or standoffish when they feel they are blending in to the crowd. FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) and mediocrity stop this type in their tracks - and saying no can often result in shutting down emotionally or fully withdrawing from the conversation or project. Feeling unneeded, a ‘Fine, do it without me if you don’t need my help’ perspective can cause friction when presented with an obstacle.

Enneagram Five is ‘The Investigator’, and before accepting or declining a proposition will typically have more questions in return. This type is interested in details, facts, research, and having a solid understanding of what is being asked of them before they can answer confidently. They may avoid saying no initially, but bookmark it in their mind to return to once they’re in a setting that allows them to come to their own conclusions.

Enneagram 6 is unique in the ways they operate when it comes to decision making, or declining interest in an offer. This type will often ‘wait and see what happens first’ before making a choice, as to not be led astray or into any unwanted situation. ‘The Skeptic’ of the Enneagram model prefers to observe a situation wholly before creating a response, and will often delay saying no until they are certain what the outcome would be.

The ‘Enthusiast’ has an interesting approach to decision making, maintaining boundaries, and standing firm in saying no to unwanted invitations. They struggle with a fear of missing out, or being trapped. This can cause conflict in spaces where saying no may be their best option, but if someone else says it on their behalf - they may say yes as to not be limited by someone else. At times, saying no can feel too limiting as they seek out excitement and new experiences.

The Challenger of the Enneagram types is often abrasive in saying no, and their firm stance can be taken as aggression at times. These types refuse to be walked over, talked over, or misled and use their confidence and sense of self to establish strong boundaries and expectations. When it comes to saying no they tend to be confrontational, but can become passive aggressive as well so long as they feel they are standing their ground.

Last but certainly not least, Enneagram Nine is The Peacemaker. Fueled by a desire to maintain harmony across the board, this type may struggle with conflict whether internal or external. Indecision, friction, or any other obstacles in communication can be anxiety inducing and can incite panic within the Enneagram Nine who only wants to find an amicable solution. While struggling to say no out of fear they tend to prioritize others' needs over their own time after time. This can lead to feeling resentful or disengaged later and cause internal conflict, fueling the fire.